Travel Is Enlightening (But Not Always Light)

Ellis County Courthouse, Waxahachie, TX. Good luck pronouncing that correctly.

Back home now from a recent visit to Texas. The destination was nothing new - I grew up in Dallas. But traveling is always instructive if you pay attention. Some things I learned during my latest sojourn:

General travel stuff

  • The flight you are early for always leaves late.
  • The chances of your flight leaving on time (or even early! yes, it does happen! which is how I ended up spending the night at a Holiday Inn on Delta's dime recently) is directly proportional to how late you are running. Very late = very likely.
  • Checking a bag at the gate is the greatest idea since pop-top beer cans, especially if you don't have to worry about making connections.
  • Getting stranded overnight is fairly painless if the hotel is free and you haven't checked your bag.
  • The people whose airport jobs entail a lot of sitting on stools seem to be the ones most eager to take their breaks.
  • Taking off is fun every time.
  • Airplane wheels thumping back into the undercarriage is scary every time.
  • Handbags are useless for travel unless they can be carried over a shoulder.
  • If your travels take you through the Atlanta airport, wear comfortable shoes.
  • If you have less than a one hour layover through ATL, you will not make your connection.
  • Always let the ladies in heels go ahead of you on the airport escalators, bless their hearts.
  • Stepping onto a Down escalator with a heavy carry-on in one hand and a purse in the other, while wearing bifocals, is the closest I'll ever get to competing on American Ninja Warrior.
  • Having a family of readers who love to pass their books along is great, but makes for a heavy carry-on. Ebooks, people!
  • If I'm going to continue carrying this many real books in my carry-on, I need to get in better shape or get a carry-on size bag with wheels.
  • If you don't think losing 5 pounds will make much difference, try getting from ATL terminal T to D with a 20 lb. carry-on. Now I know why the pioneers dumped their heavy stuff all up and down the Oregon Trail.
  • What is with the creepy billboards at ATL? One was a slightly menacing message from a cyber security outfit. Another advertised software to 'influence' customer decisions. Big Brother, anyone?

Texas Stuff

  • Every time I go to Texas, I discover a new favorite beer.
  • Believe it or not, there is such a thing as too much Tex Mex.
  • Believe it or not, there is such a thing as too much chicken fried steak with mashed potatoes and cream gravy.
  • Dallas has been overrun with donut shops. Add them to the list of taco stands, nail salons, and Walgreen's/CVS - there's one on every corner.
  • There is a heavy price to be paid for eating one's way through Texas (see what I did there?). The only thing that saved me this time: I don't like donuts.

Random Stuff

  • You get very little writing done until you put your cell phone away. Sadly, ditto for books.
  • Spanx are always a good idea. Always pack the Spanx just in case.
  • Dreds are the hair version of Hoarders.
  • Possums are way cuter as babies.
  • If NSA is creeping all of us online, how about hacking into Ancestry.com and 23andme family tree DNA data? Possibly solve some cold cases in the process, amirite?
  • When making your own window screens, aluminum window screen is to be avoided at all costs. Go with the fabric screen instead. 2 hours per screen vs 20 minutes. Hey - I said it was random!

This post originally appeared in June 2014.

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